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Halloween Jokes

Halloween Jokes! - The ghost, the witch and the watchmaker.

What's scary about a watchmaker? Nothing ... dah dumm ... dumm ... dumm

The air is getting chillier, the pumpkins are appearing, Halloween ghosts and goblins are coming out from hiding in the garage … and I’m collecting Halloween Jokes from the short jokes to the stupid jokes to the great Halloween jokes. In honor of the boooooooootiful season, here are some Halloween jokes and Halloween humor, and if you have a joke to add, send it to me or put it in the comments and I’ll add it to the list!

Q. What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
A: Bamboo.

Q: How do you mend a broken Halloween Jack-o-lantern?
A: With a pumpkin patch.


Halloween knock-knock joke…
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Boo who?
That’s all right ... don’t cry.

Q: Where do ghosts mail their Halloween greetings?
A: At the ghost office.

Q: Why did the witch put her broom in the wash for Halloween?
A: She wanted a clean sweep.

News and stories behind the humor in the Halloween Jokes page at

Q: What do you do when 20 zombies surround your house?
A: Wish them happy Halloween and give them candy.

Q: How does the witch know if it’s time to go trick or treating on Halloween?
A: She looks at her witch watch.

Q. What kind of mistakes do ghosts make?
A: Boo boos.

Q: What is a vampire's favorite holiday?
A: Fangsgiving

Q: Why didn't the vampire get invited to the Halloween party?
A: She was a pain in the neck.

Q: What does a baby witch want for Halloween?
A: A haunted doll house.

Q: What do you call ghosts who haunt skyscrapers?
A: High spirits...

Q: Who speaks at the ghost’s press conference?
A: The spooksperson.

Q: Who did Frankenstein take to the Halloween prom?
A: His ghoul friend

Q: Why does a witch ride a broom?
A: Vacuum cleaners get stuck at the end of the cord.

Halloween Jokes Funny Pumpkin
More scary-licious Halloween Jokes, please

Q: What did the first ghost say to the second ghost?
A: Do you believe in people?

Q. What is a ghost’s favorite ride at the amusement park?
A: The roller ghoster.

Q: What's vampire fast food?
A: Someone with high blood pressure.

Q: What do witches put on their hair to hold it in place?
A: Scare spray.

Q: Why are ghosts bad at telling lies?
A: Because you see right through them …

Q: What kind of streets do zombies like the best?
A: Dead ends.

Q: What is a witch's favorite subject in school?
A: Spell-ing

Q: What is a ghost's favorite bird?
A: A scare crow.

Q: What does a skeleton order at a restaurant?
A: Spare ribs.

Q: What does a vampire never order at a restaurant?
A: A stake sandwich.

Q: Where do ghosts go on vacation?
A: Lake Erie.

Halloween Jokes at Jokes and Humor Blog

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